Threesomes When You Have a Partner: How Does That Work?

Threesomes When You Have a Partner: How Does That Work?

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Whether you’re a man or a woman, chances are that you’ve fantasized about having a threesome at least once in your lifetime. We often think of threesomes as a luxury only enjoyed by sexually active singles, endlessly scrolling their online dating feeds in search of men and women willing to participate in one. Still, in truth, threesomes can be explored by anyone, even those in a loving relationship! In this article, we’ll be taking a look at threesomes with the assumption that you (the reader) are currently in a relationship. Is it likely that my partner will be interested in joining forces with a stranger we meet on the online dating platform? Can this actually help our relationship? What are the risks? Let’s find out!

 

The Fantasy of a Threesome

 

Having a threesome is a popular fantasy in people of all ages, regardless of their gender. Unsurprisingly, 95% of men have fantasized about having a threesome, but did you know that 87% of women also fantasized about the same thing? The idea of having two sexual partners rather than one sounds extremely appealing, especially if one has been in a committed, monogamous partnership for a long time. A threesome is easiest to find with specialized services because people go there purposefully for it. Undoubtedly, the idea of a threesome is appealing. The idea of a threesome is certainly appealing, so it pays to choose carefully online platforms that many people trust.

The main problem people have with threesomes isn’t finding one; it’s having one! When it comes to threesomes, expectations vary widely, so how you personally expect the experience to go may not align whatsoever with your partners’ expectations. This is why who you choose to have a threesome with is so important. If you choose incorrectly, the encounter may not live up to your expectations, or worse—it could actually ruin the relationship you’re already in! Besides choosing a compatible third person, you should also go over the “do’s” and “don’ts” with your partner. Interestingly, sexual acts aren’t often the things that get under your partner’s skin; it’s the ones that could be interpreted as “affectionate.”

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Two Tips for Finding the Right Person for a Threesome

 

The term “unicorn” is often used to describe a bisexual woman who’s willing to have a threesome, but in truth, it can be applied to anyone single who’s open to a threesome. Of course, much like the mythological creatures, they can be extremely hard to track down, so here are a few tips to help you in your search.

 

  • Talk it out with your partner first. You two should talk about what you expect from the threesome. You should both be aware of the other party’s sexual position preferences, the “Do’s” and the “Don’ts” before beginning your hunt. It’s also worthwhile discussing the idea of sex toys since they can be a lot of fun when added to a threesome
  • Set the standards for your unicorn. By establishing a partner criteria upfront, you’ll be able to determine if a person is a good match (even if your partner isn’t present at that time!). This can be extremely helpful if you meet someone who might be a good threesome partner while you’re out and about since you can bring them back without any worry of your partner rejecting the idea.

 

Why Would Regular Partners Want to Have a Threesome?

 

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Sex with your partner can be great, but it can also become boring after a while. Couples often consider threesomes to “spice up” their partnership when they’ve run out of new things to try in the bedroom. You might think that threesomes would be most popular among younger people, but in fact, threeways are most appealing to married people between the ages of 40 and 60! Although not seen as a “traditional” activity, enjoying a third partner can actually help save an otherwise failing relationship. Threesomes are a great alternative to cheating because they allow for sexual exploration without betraying your partner’s trust. Furthermore, it’s an experience that you can share together as a couple.

 

Involving an additional partner is also a great way to explore other sexual fantasies you may have, such as cuckolding or BDSM. How realistic acting out these fantasies is will depend largely on your partner’s own limits and the third person you add to the mix, but you can improve the chance of fulfilling any sexual dreams by discussing them with your partner beforehand. They will most likely have fantasies of their own, which may work together with or be contrary to your own fantasies. By discussing them before finding your third partner, you can set expectations for the experience, which will lead to a better (and more sexually fulfilling) time for all! And searching for a partner online at various dating services will help you keep some degree of anonymity, thus ensuring your fantasies and their reenactment stay your own and private; consider it if you’re not ready or brave enough to share them with the world.

 

Even if you think your partner may not be interested in having a threesome, it’s worthwhile to ask them anyway. As mentioned above, 95% of men and 87% of women have fantasized about having a threesome before, so the odds are in your favor. Happy unicorn hunting!

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